The reason you are not listening to a new episode of The Stairwell Showcase tonight is because Windows 10 has killed my inner child and my ability to broadcast. I tried to fight off the free upgrade to this piece of shit operating system as best I could, but NO!
One day, it decided to download itself onto one of two laptops. I kept telling it to fuck off, but that evil white window icon in the lower right corner of the task bar kept popping up messages telling me I needed to upgrade this instant. After one last middle finger to another pop-up message, it finally returned the gesture and began to download itself onto the laptop. There was no stopping it. It gave me no choice and assured me that all of my files would be in the same place they were prior to the upgrade. What it didn’t tell me was that 90% of the previously installed programs I had installed on this laptop (including SAM Broadcaster) would no longer work. Yeah, your files are still there but you CAN’T USE THEM!!! It also didn’t tell me that the start button on the Taskbar would only reveal the start menu when it felt like it. WTF?!?!?!
Well, I at least had a desktop and a second laptop that still had Windows 7, so I continued on trying to ignore the cursed laptop. And then, like a biblical plague, the forced upgrade spread to the desktop. Only this time it was much more aggressive – it asked me once, I told it to fuck off, it gave me the middle finger and installed itself onto the desktop. It was hopeless trying to stop it. Once again, it assured me that all of my files would be right where I left them. While that was the case, even more problems arose. Once again, 90% of the previously installed programs (including SAM Broadcaster) would no longer work. When I would try to download the latest versions of some frequently used programs and try to install them, an error message saying “The service did not respond to the start or control request in a timely fashion.” SO WHAT?!?!? Just install the fucking program!!! Want to uninstall an existing program on this computer? FORGET IT! NO UNINSTALL FOR YOU!!
The problems for the desktop have not stopped there. Not only did I have yet another lazy start button that only produced the start menu half the time, I also had a very slow and lazy right click menu. Usually, one right click of the mouse, and the all important menu would appear, right? WRONG!! Fifteen right clicks later, and it MIGHT decide to show up! Oh, and when I tried to see if the option was there to downgrade to Windows 7 in the settings and updates menu, NO OPTIONS were there! Options, what are those? Menus that give you access to important settings? No, you just get a useless blue popup window that only says “Settings”!! Wanna end a task or unfreeze your computer using the Control-Alt-Delete command? Sure, but the Task Manager wouldn’t even appear! Wanna play a music file or watch a video directly from your desktop? What the hell do you want to do that for?? No playing music or watching videos for you! No, Windows Media Player shits itself every time and the other media playing software you have on this computer is an older version so that will not work either!!
So, the only laptop left standing with Windows 7 on it is the second laptop. The good news there at least is that the “Get Windows 10” window is saying that this laptop has way too many things installed on it that are not compatible with Windows 10. THERE IS HOPE!!! The bad news is that the copy of SAM broadcaster that is on this laptop just had the registration key expire on me and I currently have no way to get a new key. Technology hates me today.
Until I can afford an external hard drive large enough to backup everything onto the infected computers and cleans them of Windows 10, or get a new registration key for the second laptop, you will be getting more blogs and fewer broadcasts from me.
The moral of this story – do not upgrade to Windows 10 and always make sure your registration keys are not expired. At least the violin that’s playing in the background is played by Lindsey Stirling with Lzzy Hale singing along.0