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19th Ave New York, NY 95822, USA

when you troll an iceberg

lost part of this article but someone was trolling my messenger on facebook and i decided to play along. this is what happened after they decided to give me another run.

(ok, so that didn’t work and they came back again)

Her: Ok are you married

Me: Yes. To myself. I have control issues. But to my credit, I did play hard to get

Her: Omo iya (apparently Nigerian)

Me. I came home one day, I was there. Screw it. I left.

Her: Bowoni

Me: So you've been there too

Her: Where u from

Me: 1965. Can we move this on faster?

Her: How

Me: We need to be bff in a few minutes

Her: Are u

Me: In fact, I am

I thought this as well

Her: I dont understand u

Me: I don't understand me either. Screw it. I'm leaving me. Can we go get yogert?

Her: How

Me: What are you wearing? Is it edible?

Her: Why asking

Me: Cause I just left myself for you!!!!

Her: Where are you from

Me: 1965. Can we move past that?! Let's talk g strings. I wear mine backwards

Her: Meaning

Me: Do I really have to explain backwards? Damn it. I don't want yogurt anymore and I'm going to beg myself to take me back

Her: Bye

Me: Meaning

Her: Why

Me: It means you don't understand it, and you never will.

Her: You say you are going to bed

Me: What part of China are you in?

Her: Am not from china

Me: I am.

Her: Ok

Me: But I'll name my firstborn in our memory

Her: How do you mean

Me: I saw an idiot pass by. I named him (insert “her” name here)

Her: Mdaning

Me: Googalie google

Her: I will not talk to you agian

Me: Promises promises

Her: What

Me: Sinner

Her: F*** off

Me: How much?

Her: ?

Me: Will you be my friend?

Her: Yes

Me: Will you pet my pony?

Her: How

Me: Long soft strokes

Her: Wow. Can i see it

Me: Short ones if you're a midget

Her: I want to see it

Me: You want to see my midget?

Her: Yes

Me: Do you have wide angle eyes

Her: Let me see it

Me: I'm shy

Her: Let me see it

Me: Send me your credit card info. Its safe

Her: Show me your pony first

Me: Pay to play

Her: F*** off then

Me: Haven't we been here before? Will you be my friend?

Her: Yes

Me: I have no arms. Will you wipe my buttocks?

Her: How

Me: Kleenix preferably. But open to power tool ideas

Her: ?

Me: Power tools. Tools operated by power. Work with me my a** itches

Her: Ok

Me: So if I put a roll of kleenix on a dewalt cordless drill, would you clean my a**?

Her: Yes

Me: I'll have to do it with my mouth cause I have no arms, but I miss a clean a**. Did you ever know that you're me hero?

Her: Ok

Me: So, what's your sign?

Her: ?

Me: I'm an asstrotergious. What are you?


I saw white picket fences for us.....

A parakeet singing partridge family songs....

I just don't know why you quit talking to me

We can use ryobi if you want

Will you be my friend?

Chat Conversation End